Batting first, the Swingers got off to a flyer with three quick outs. Whatters made it to first, but was soon out on second from Krusty’s hit. However that was around catch of the season, by the Tiger's second base woman. Kitch, batting second, started with his usual air shot. Well it has to be done you know, get it out of the way early and settle the team down. His second hit was a rocket straight back at the pitcher, who had to do the full Neo to get out of the way. The Tiger's second base woman had us all fooled as it looked like she was just trying to get out of the way, but what she really was doing was show boating. She caught the ball while facing the other way, with her eyes closed and catching the ball behind her back. Gob smacked or what, it was a real palm stinger as well.
Tiger'a Pitcher didges Kitch's screamer
So nothing from the first inning. To the field and we thought no problem we’ll get it back here. Cue embarrassing fielding. First Krusty dropped a tricky steepling catch out in left field. Kitch to his eternal shame dropped a dolly catch (even though it was over my shoulder! Blast cannot think of any other excuses, no wait the sun was in my eyes.) However some good work in the out field (Fordy!) and pitching (Whatters) restricted Tigers to 2 runs.
Right, we thought, this is our inning. Nope. Apart from Kieran getting round for a run off, some fine hitting by himself, Power and Fordy. However Brucey was having a mare. Two hits foul and he was ‘OUTTA THERE!’, and our third out. So 2 innings, 1 run, and we were all beginning to fear for our arms.
However in Tiger’s second inning some fine pitching by Whatters and a little revenge for Kitch getting their second base woman out at first and they score nought too.
3rd Innings and our batting was getting worse. A good hit from Christy A got her to second. Whatters shelled out to two foul balls, he was being tempted to hit inside pitches. If Becs had been there his ears would have been ringing. A hit for me got me to second and Christy A to third. Then their pitcher got in on the act and struck out Kristy and Hough. Hough had clearly got his sporting techniques confused;
An artist’s impression of The Hoff at the tee/plate, except The Hoff was swinging and missing (like everyone else).
Third innings, no runs, and it got worse. A miss field at short by (I fear for his safety) Brucey and some clean hitting by the Tigers got them 2 more runs. Now we are in the mire. 4-1 down. The only bright spot so far was some slick fielding in the deep. (How strange it is to compliment Fordy!)
The fourth inning and six straight outs and no score for either team.
I think news had filtered through to Becs in Oxford;
Fifth innings and we were becoming increasingly worried about our arms. Thank god for our ringer Brucey, next up to bat. All rested with him. Oh! Fuck. Yep first ball clang, foul. Second pitch whoosh! Missed, Brucey struck out. Now I promised not to tell Smithy, so I got someone else to type this bit. The cat calls, the jeering where all the sounds of relief, at least it wouldn’t be us that Becs went for first. Brucey was fresh meat for the barbie. Christy A, Whatters and Coach (in for Kitch) all got hits, but some smart fielding and Whatters over running third meant yet again no runs for the Swingers.
More good work in the field and accurate pitching saw us shut out the Tigers. 4-1 and bottom of the 5th.
Two innings left for us to save our collective hides. GULP!
Top of the sixth. Hough was unlucky to get out first up. Kieran smacked the granny out of it but their outfield was pretty good and only managed to get to second. Power came in with another hit, getting Kieran home, with some of his smart running. At this point a random person from a neighbouring pitch decided to question my umpiring decision. I would love to say he was sent packing with a cough to the ear and a boot to the backside. But he was just too far away. Fordy crashed the ball, but only managed to get to second but got Power home. Things are looking up. Pebble then hit to right field and got Fordy home. Now we can take the lead, our much honoured ringer is up. Come on Brucey give it some! And he did, straight down the throat of the centre right fields man.
3 runs, 4 all and them to bat. Whatters and Coach did for the first batter, then Amanda subbing in for Pebble at back stop made what I am unreliably informed was our first catch at back stop. Snuffling the catch with cat like reflexes, in fact the catch was too fast to be caught on camera! Whatters was ice cold for the last out.
4 all and the last inning, do or die at the hands of Becs for the stuttering Swingers.
Somehow Whatters was out twice in this inning, swinging at high and inside pitches again probably. A sneaky hit to centre field by yours truly (back in for Coach after loosing the bottle cap toss!). Another hit from Kristy and I get in to give us the lead for the first time. A hit from Hough, who had decided to give up the golf swing for a more formal cricket style shot. Kieran does the business again, getting Kristy home and this is looking like a lead. Power gets another hit, (good batting display by the Vice Captain) and the bases are loaded. Fordy up, Kablaaaaaaaaaaam straight to the fielder. Two down and a 2 run lead. Amanda is up and a nice hit that is made fair by the girl on first base. Three run lead as Hough gets in. Oh no it can’t be, yes it’s the busted flush, the ringer that has rung is up. I have to say he came to the plate looking over his shoulder, wishing he was still drinking beer. Then the biggest hit of the day. Home run, another three runs. The crowd goes wild, Brucey runs round like a man reborn.
Tigers pitcher, (who I have to say was a grumpy sod all game) pitched well to get Whatters again.
So the last hit for Tigers, first hit from their left hander and mass confusion between Brucey and Kitch lets her get to first. My fault honest! Not yours Brucey!
However some nervy but accurate pitching and a tag at second and we where there for the narrowest of victories.
Omissions; Power putting her body on the line in the fourth inning to stop the ball at second base. Dodgy umpiring decisions, who could that be? Whatters driving. The drinking in the Chapel and the re-enforcement of Rob T’s reputation!
The old football cliché goes that if you can win while you’re playing badly then you’ve got title potential, and man did we win bad.
FINAL SCORE : Swingers 10 - Tigers 4
Your Proximity Swingers where
Da Gals
Claire the Power
Kristy ‘Krusty’ Adams
Claire ‘Pebble’ Stones
Amanda Warwick
Christy Aylen
Da Guys
Andy ‘Whatters’ Whatley
Andrew ‘Kitch’ Kitchener
Richie ‘Coach’ Hepburn
James ‘The Hoff’ Hough
Rob ‘He’s all hands’ T
Andy ‘Fordy’ Ford
Bruce ‘Gooster’ Smith
Beer Squad
Sadly missing until one-armed bandit, aka Simmo, rocked up for the last beer.
MVP
It was a close one this week. Power could of decided to go for herself, with a fine batting display and full bodily committed fielding display, or the only reliable batter Kieran. However it goes to Amanda Warwick, a crucial hit in the final inning and the one and only back stop catch for the Swingers, the only thing missing a suitable knick name. Well played.
Your much relieved intrepid reporter
Kitch
2 comments:
Luvvin it. Go Proximity Swingers go.
Ta
It's a little tricky getting the layout right because of what I'm goning to call the utoscripting.
But after some fannying about it works fine.
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